The first step in getting what you want is knowing what you want.
Have you taken time to think about what you really want and why? (I will talk about the importance of the “why” next week.)
This may sound obvious, but in the past I have found myself wanting things simply because others wanted them.
You are your own person. You have your own wants and desires. What you want isn’t the same as what others want, nor should it be.
So how do you find out what you really want—and shouldn’t you know this already?
No, you don’t always know what you really want. You have been exposed to others’ influences for so long that you don’t always know what you want.
As you follow this process, you will be amazed by what you discover about yourself.
All of your life you have been influenced by your parents, your friends, even by society. All of these forces have left their impression on you.
All of the forces listed above have meant well. They usually think they have your best interest in mind, but they aren’t you. Only you can choose what you want.
What I Have Found That Works
What worked for me—and this surprised me—was writing out what I want.
I hadn’t done much writing. English wasn’t my favorite subject in school; now it’s one of those classes that I wish I had paid more attention to.
I thought that organizing things in my mind or talking with others would bring out what I wanted and help me discover and organize my thoughts.
Talking was more fun, but it didn’t change my results—at least not very fast—so I went back to writing.
I usually type, but at times I write with pen and paper. If I want to go back and reference anything, I type it. My handwriting isn’t always legible, especially when I’m in a hurry.
It doesn’t matter which you choose, handwriting or typing. The mere act of writing will make you organize your thoughts.
The process of organizing and writing requires you to consider what you are writing. It also requires you to organize your thoughts. Your first draft can be in any order, but the process of forcing yourself to think through your ideas will reveal to you what you want. As you consider different possibilities some will pull you in, but others you will find leave you cold.
This process alone clears up many issues.
The other surprising discovery I made was that when I am writing, sometimes it seems that my fingers have a mind of their own. I will write things I didn’t know that I wanted, and I will surprise myself.
This is my subconscious mind bringing to my attention what I really want.
Once you know what you really want, you can make plans to get it.
Here is a quote on this subject from Leland Val Van de Wall that has stuck with me for years:
Writing causes thinking.
Thinking creates an image.
Images control feelings.
Feelings cause actions.
Actions create results.
So the first step in getting the results you want is to write down what you want.
Give it a try. What do you have to lose? And who knows—you may discover your life’s calling and move forward at a rapid pace, enjoying life more and more every day.
The more times you follow this process, the clearer your thoughts will be. You have a lifetime of other people’s thoughts influencing you. As you complete the process over and over, you will find yourself getting a clearer and clearer vision of what you want. Make a commitment to spend some time every week—or better yet, every day—working on what you want.
Follow this process and before long you will get what you want.
Have a great week.